The first commandment is to honor your father and
mother. It came with a promise. Honor
your father and your mother, as the LORD your God commanded you, that your days
may be long, and that it may go well with you in the land that the LORD your
God is giving you. Deuteronomy 5:16 ESV
This can be a nearly insurmountable commandment for
those who have endured abuse and unspeakable horror at the hands of their
parents. And yet, God commands it.
Recently, a speaker shared her struggle with this
commandment. Her mother had abused her terribly. As a teenager, she put her
mother out of her life. In midlife, God asked her to forgive her
mother and honor her. It was a struggle but she was
obedient. Their reunion was sweet and their relationship is excellent now. She
stepped out in faith and God took it the rest of the way. He honored her
obedience.
I’ve also known many women who were sexually abused by
a family member or someone they trusted. The enemy - in his craving to lie,
steal and destroy - uses those experiences to bring deep, deep wounding. Only
God, in His love, grace, mercy and gentleness can bring healing and close those
doors that allow the enemy legal right and access to torment and oppress.
I can't speak to
the outcome you may experience. I do know that God can prepare hearts.
My husband and I prayed for months before a conversation we had with my
parents about issues from my past. It was amazing what God did! His
timing is perfect. Seek Him before, during and after any attempt to
resolve issues or reconcile. Pray! Pray! Pray!
(If anyone in the
Greater Cleveland area wants to know about Freedom Weekends, let me know. Larry
and I just attended one and all I can say is WOW! I experienced freedom from heavy
oppression as well as physical healing – Hallelujah! “And we
know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those
who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28)
We also need to honor our
Father God. The words of Paul in his letter to the church in Ephesus describe
what God has done for us so well. “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord
Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the
heavenly places, even as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world,
that we should be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined us for
adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will, to
the praise of His glorious grace, with which He has blessed us in the Beloved. In
Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses,
according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished upon us, in all wisdom
and insight making known to us the mystery of His will, according to His
purpose, which He set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to
unite all things in Him, things in heaven and things on earth. In Him we have
obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of Him
who works all things according to the counsel of His will, so that we who were
the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of His glory. In Him you
also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and
believed in Him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the
guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise
of His glory.” Ephesians 1:3-14 ESV He is worthy of our honor and praise!
I encourage you to honor
your father and mother. If there are unresolved issues – even if one or both of
your parents are no longer living - take them to God. He will direct your steps
and provide all you need along the way. Allow Him to work through you. He can
complete a work that will bring you freedom and wholeness that can only be
found in and through Him.